Hello, I am still alive and well. I know I have not logged in to my blog for 4months now, and hey a lot has happened in the past 4 months. There was some unprofessional power struggle at the workplace and to make it short I was being unfairly dismissed of being the next in line to lead the department. However looking at my previous post I realize I am not into that role too just that it is quite ugly the way the whole thing was. Most people expected me to be the next one but unfortunately, the person I work with had some issues with me which I was not aware of and she prevented me from being next in line. I do not know how she convinced the administrative part but the whole incident made me realize 1 thing: I do not have any senior who supports me. I tried to bring up the injustice but I seem to be ignored. Since the role does not come with a pay raise and it only has more responsibilities, I gave up fighting for that role.
The irony is that the person who is going to take on the role is actually more junior to me in terms of work experience but senior in age like 2 years but I think it's not about who is older but who is more qualified. The whole incident made me feel very disrespected and it demotivates me to want to make positive changes in the workplace. I kinda adopted the F-it attitude now. It felt so good today when I just said "seems like you've got the help you need, I shall take my leave then" and I left. Alright enough of this, the silver lining is that it made me see through a lot of people who I thought I could count on.
What are the best things that have happened to me so far? I am more consistent with my exercise. I finally decided what I want to subspecialize in and I am telling myself to stick to the goal and do not get distracted. I have a better relationship with my loved ones. I am still friends with "teacher" and we still communicate often. He is now in Altay Perfecture and it is snowing over there which makes it so magical. It seems the snow there is quite powdery, well I have never seen snow before so I won't be able to comprehend much but he is having the time of his life. I am playing less games, lesser but definitely still playing. I enjoy having that crazy FF as my friend spamming emojis like no body's business! I think having the right people as friends is important cause it really can inspire you to do better in life.
I could say I deserve a pat on my back for not letting worldly matters change my passion in what I do. Yes, manpower is still scarce, it is really tiring to work but I still love what I do and I will continue to do well in what I do. I am also thinking of going abroad but a lovely senior shared about the pros and cons and for now I think the pull factor is not so strong enough for me to leave the country but the push factor seems to get a little bit more stronger. Anyway universe, I just want to let you know that I am willing to accept major shifts and changes and if it is for my benefit, please drive me out of my comfort zone and take me to my next adventure!
Oh I didn't get to go Beijing in September and I went to other conferences within the country but I really hope I can go to China next year.
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