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Life = Energy + Time

 Today I listened to Master Louis' free webinar on 奇门遁甲. The best take-home message is the definition of life. He mentioned that life means energy and time and it made me wonder if I have been spending time and energy on the right things and if I did not it means I am wasting my life. It feels rather uncomfortable to reflect on how I have been spending my days since graduation. I do not want to unnecessarily scrutinize myself and instead of thinking what I did not achieve or do, I am going to list out what I have achieved so far. 

1. Did central venous line on a 2.7kg infant and the procedure was uneventful 

2. Handled a complication professionally and although it is still ongoing, I think I did well (no one will ever know the amount of sleepless nights I had)

3. Overcome my fear by doing the same procedure again a few times and acknowledging the fact that I don't have to blame myself over and over again 

4. Presented on a national level event, had stage fright but I guess it wasn't so bad 

5. upgraded my knowledge pertaining ultrasound...I wish I could be well prepared for certification! (yeah the exam and certification part is bugging me as I badly wanted to be certified but I am not ready yet!） 

6. Supervised CME for the first time and received good feedback

7. Tried making cheese tart and it was 80% successful 

8. Helped my mother in law with her stall whenever I am not occupied every Sunday. I try my best to make it whenever I can

9. Bravely cancelled my health insurance (not sure why but I felt it is the best decision and I felt relieved to have the courage to do without it) 

10. Figured out how to send gifts to China via Tao Bao and WeChat (somehow I just love sending gifts to my game friends!)

Have I done anything meaningful everyday? Perhaps the nature of my job itself is already meaningful. I think every career has its purpose and I am thankful to those encounters in my daily work that added value to my life. It is not like I crave for acknowledgement but when someone does express gratitude it makes me feel what I am doing it worth it, worth my time and energy and that means my life is not wasted. Of course other than seeking affirmation externally, one should seek internally and that is why I am only going to focus on the good and positive things in my life. Master say if we are happy we will look younger than our actual age and I really need that. 


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